My Name is Tinu. And I Have AnxPostComitis.
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In my offline world, I’m shy around new people.
See, when I was growing up, we moved a lot, and as a bookworm, I didn’t have what you call “the social skills” as my fellow Waterboy fans will call it. Part of that little girl in me never grew up. In that way, I’m a lot like most people.
When I first came to the web, I was here to escape phone interactions and in-person chats, which makes me like a lot of people.
What makes me not like a lot of people was that I knew it wouldn’t last. I knew the popular kids would find a way for us to all interact online. And then…
I’d have to talk to people. Mon Dieu!
So I sucked it up and started letting people call me, write me, etc, until I got so overwhelmed by the constant barrage that I reworked my system of contact several times. (I have a better handle on how to get my current clients in touch with me immediately. But it’s nowhere near perfect for anything else, and our team is constantly trying to make it better).
I’m not alone in this aliment either. Those with Anxpostcomitis are everywhere you go online.
I’m that person who thinks for about ten minutes before making a 3 sentence post to a forum.
I’m the person who reads your blog every day like it’s a religion, but has a paralyzing fear of responding to a post with a comment.
Even posting to my own blog was a struggle at first.
I was so afraid of what people would say, and would often think about a post made today would be taken up to three years later, that half of my best work never made it to my blog the first year.
So what does my fake ailment, AnxPostComitis have to do with you?
There are things that you can do if you want people like me to comment more often, and there are some you can do if you’re like me. And we’ll talk about that next.
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Wow…this was a brilliant post. You know why? We both suffer from the same disease. It’s like any habit though….once you break yourself of it…it begin to go away. I just joined this new network callled Ning and I”m paralyzed on it and I don’t know why.
You left a post on my blog, Resource Economics, which is http://evnucci.wordpress.com…but I bet you didn’t know that a lot of our comments end up in spam! Well I’ve learned that over time…so I go went through my 65 spam comments and found yours…otherwise I never would have known that you left a comment on my blog.
Bet you didn’t know that did you?
Hey Ev,
You’d be surprised, a lot of mine go to spam too. Thank you so much for findng it. Over time, I started to feel better about talking to people online, but I still get anxious when I’m at a blog of someone I admire or just met. I sit there like “okay, should I say that - what if it sounds stupid. Then everyone will think I’m an idiot and my rep will… ” blahblahblah.
Even with this comment, I kept thinking, okay, don’t make it TOO long, but don’t just say thanks because that’s not enough comment, your visitors deserve more!
And on it goes.
Hi Tinu, I did not know that this “lack of social skills” has a name. I really thought you were sick, this is why I clicked on this post, to see how bad it is. I’m glad you are not sick. And I’m happy I discovered your blog. It surely looks useful.
LOL… well if it makes you feel any better Simonne, I *am* sick, just not with anything that’s (presently) life threatening. But I did, for a really long time, lack the ability to really strike up conversation and meet and talk to people I didn’t know as a kid. When I grew up, I had pretty much overcome it until I went online. Then, oh boy, not good.
It comes and it goes, but I get over it. Whaddayagonnado?
I’m glad you’re enjoying the blog. I’ll be visiting yours shortly.